Sometimes my memories are activated by the simplest of things. There is a program that I saw for the very first time while I was staying in our tiny small town hospital with my dad. I didn’t know it at the time, but there would be many more stays there, and maybe five years later, just a few rooms away, my dad would take his final breath. That night however, I had to stay awake, and the beginning of each episode of this show that became my friend, starts with such relaxing music…. The same for each episode. The Last Alaskans. I mention it now because I saw it pop up on the tv and it instantly took me back, maybe ten years back. Even now I cannot process the speed and cost of those years, and in my private moments, some of these things weigh heavy. There was a saying that I would often tell my children that went something like this….

Pack your bags lightly because the mistakes you make can become a burden you carry later.

The truth though, is that even when you think you’re doing everything properly, time is filled with reevaluation and regrets. That’s alright I think, but looking back, I would not trade those moments for anything. I would not, and now so many of those moments are attached to a song, or a tv show, or an event, and sometimes all it takes is a peaceful little opening tune and I’m right back in that room, and I can see my dad….

ws