• I was pretty excited about being bitten by a spider this summer but so far the only super power I seem to have is drinking more than I should.
  • I wish somebody had pulled me aside and explained how expensive clothes were before l went on this diet and lost forty pounds.
  • Have you ever had a car you didn’t particularly care for but it looks like it will run forever?… Damn Honda!
  • Look, I know it’s been quite a while now, but I need more time to process Jon Snow not ending up on the Iron Throne.
  • Everybody makes mistakes but how horrible of a parent do you have to be to forget to take your kid with you on vacation twice Kevin’s mom?
  • Don’t even get me started on Kevin’s dad… talk about phoning it in.

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