Nagging works. Not at first, mind you, but like a slow grinding wheel, over time, little by little…

Why do you have old civil war statues everywhere?

Why do you bring God up all the time?

Why do you question global warming?

Why can’t I kill my baby?

Why can’t folks from other countries come over here and vote?

Why can’t I make you pay for things I want?

Why can’t we change Merry Christmas to Happy Holidays?

I don’t like your cute little old song filled with sexual innuendo.

I don’t like your guns.

I don’t like that you are a old white man.

Why can’t I have a data plan like you have?

Why is your guy in the White House?

Why can’t I make you just like me?

Honestly, the answer to every one of your questions is because…

YOU’RE BAT SHIT CRAZY. YOU ARE THE MOST UNHAPPY PEOPLE ON THE PLANET… AND THAT INCLUDES POOR FOLKS FROM EVERY SHIT HOLE, IN EVERY CORNER OF EVERY THIRD WORLD NIGHTMARE, ALL THE WAY BACK TO THE STONE AGE.

But just the same, I give up. Send some of your eager snot nosed delinquents down to turn my car over and set it ablaze. Take it all. I would choose the walking dead over you, but I am tired of the fight, and now that I stand on the sidelines, I am looking forward to all your future shenanigans….

You know what? Forget all that…

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

ws