This title is misleading because I am the one who just bought two new pair of jeans. last year I bought a  pair of big jeans knowing that I needed them just to hold me over until I could take a few pounds off. Well, one year later has brought me to a crossroad in my clothing choices.Hang on cause we will come right back to this in a few.

I have a question for everyone. Do you have a special place in your closet for clothes that you will be able to wear again as soon as you lose a few pounds? My next question is…. how do you know when its alright to let them go? I had mine divided into three groups.

1. Buff Wayne.
2. Normal Wayne.
3. Fat Wayne.

I  haven’t seen buff Wayne in about eight years. Goodbye buff Wayne clothes.

I think I need to rethink my groups.

I think my new grouping will look  something like this….

1. Normal Wayne.
2. Fat Wayne  Normal Wayne.
3. Sweatpants Wayne.

So back to this crossroads. The new normal Wayne needs to dress a little different because the new normal Wayne has a few extra pounds around his middle. It really doesn’t sound so bad when you are careful how you word the fact that the previous normal Wayne’s pants are about three inches apart and the continent is drifting. I’m going to say one more thing about this and then I will let it go. Isn’t it ironic that just as you can use a senior discount at virtually every buffet in North America, your metabolism slows down? I have a few more rather ironic things to share but I will save those for another day.

This weight gain thing has taught me a few things and you know how great I am at sharing so here it is….

1. If you have not been able to wear it for two years, set it free.
2. The only thing you really need a mirror for is shaving and make up.
3. Scales are for fish.
4. Loose is always better.